Sometimes I talk about magic the most when I’m feeling it the least. Not because I think, “Hey, today I want to be a liar,” but because sometimes when I call up magic, old fear and programming and external cultural bullshit comes up too.
Which is why I have to feel what I feel and do what I know to do to adjust: dance around the house, sit with my back against a tree, find a swing set, feel myself surrounded by white light, walk through a primeval forest.
If I’m not too mean to myself and don’t push, the magic comes back when it’s ready.
