My boyfriend went to a pet psychic, because that’s what we do in this house.

He was concerned that Cosmo, our boy cat, was beating up on his sister Sera. They’re siblings, born to a stray cat on the property around the time my boyfriend and I got together. They make little chirping sounds and enjoy eating rodents and watching TV with us. Sera is especially fond of Jamie Oliver’s cooking show.

According to the psychic, Cosmo has always been a dog in the past - most recently a German Shepherd - and was just rough-housing with his sister because that’s how he enjoys interacting. But Sera was acting traumatized because she’s used to being at the top of the food chain. She’s always been a big cat, like a lynx or a lion, and being harassed by a nine-pound domesticated house pet is a real comedown for her.

All this explains why Cosmo follows us around to beg for attention while Sera is weird about being touched and her main hobby is racing out of the room to hide under a large piece of furniture.

Despite her skittishness, I’ve started calling her my lap tiger. Proud queen of the household who occasionally deigns to sit near me.